As I reflect on my own mental health journey, I’m reminded that it’s not always an overnight fix. For some of us, mental health can be like an addiction—always lurking in the back of our minds, waiting to pounce. But here’s the thing: once you can recognise and be open about your mental health, you begin to recognise the trigger points that can potentially cause an episode.

For me, that’s been a game-changer. I’ve learned to identify the signs that I’m heading for a rough patch, and I’ve developed coping mechanisms to deal with them. One of the things that works for me is keeping my mind occupied. When I’m not working, I tend to fill my time with writing poetry or reading. It’s not about avoiding my problems, but about giving my brain something else to focus on.

As I said in my last blog post, there’s no right or wrong way to cope with mental health. What works for me might not work for you, and that’s okay. The important thing is to find what works for you and to be open about it.

My mental health is good now, but I know that it’s not something that I can ever truly “conquer.” Like an addiction, it’s always there, lurking in the background. But that’s okay. I’ve learned to live with it, and I’ve even found that helping others has been a key part of my own recovery.

As men, we’re often taught to be strong, to tough it out, and to never show weakness. But I believe that’s a mistake. Talking about mental health, seeking help, and being open about our struggles—these are signs of strength, not weakness.

I remember when I first started opening up about my mental health. It was scary, and it felt vulnerable. But it was also liberating. For the first time, I felt like I could be myself, without fear of judgement or rejection.

Of course, it’s not always easy. There are still days when I struggle, when the darkness feels overwhelming, and when I wonder if I’ll ever be free. But those days are fewer and further between now. And when they do come, I know that I have the tools to cope.

One of the most important things I’ve learned is the importance of self-care. For me, that means taking time for myself, doing things that I enjoy, and prioritising my own needs. It’s not selfish; it’s necessary.

I’ve also learned the value of community. Surrounding myself with people who understand and support me has been a game-changer. We can support each other, encourage each other, and remind each other that we’re not alone.

If you’re struggling with mental health, know that you’re not alone. Know that it’s okay to not be okay, and that seeking help is a sign of courage, not weakness. And if you’re doing well, don’t forget that mental health is a journey, not a destination. Keep working on yourself, keep talking about your struggles, and keep helping others.

Here’s a short poem that sums up my thoughts:

A journey, not a destination, that’s what they say
About mental health, and the struggles we face each day
It’s not something we conquer, but something we learn to live with
And with the right tools, and the right support, we can thrive and give.


written by Darren Parker

blogger @poemstellium